Portions for Foxes (This seems to be about music)

So no interview. Lot's of hanging out with lots of people. Turns out that I may be an introvert so this is slightly awkward. I feel like I should take a test to find out if I'm an introvert but I doubt buzzfeed has a test that would be accurate... (Update: I took a test, apparently I AM an introvert, I feel like I've lived my life as a lie. Thank God Kat told me I could be an introvert.I never even considered it. How the heck did I get by this whole time being so busy all the time?)

I was thinking that I should title this blog "Another One Bites the Dust" but then I'd have to listen to it and even though I enjoy Queen, I have to be in the mood for Queen. So I guess I will just start by saying, today I had my first FB 'friend' removal since beginning the project. It's kind of sad because I thought I was friends with said person or at least on friendly terms but I don't take it personally. I was a little confused as to why he added me in the first place, he never 'liked' any of my posts or commented on them so I didn't really get it. Why add a 'friend' if you don't have any intention on being a 'friend'? I reached out a few times on different occasions and then just pressed the 'unfriend' button. Easy peasy. No time to waste. Life is short. No time to dwell.

I feel like I'm in a much better place. I'm thinking eye of the storm here though. I say this because the days are getting easier. I'm accepting what is and what I cannot change but I also haven't seen Led's family for the memorial yet and that will be another storm in itself. Generally, I have moments that are easy. I went most of the day without crying, which is awesome. I heard an acoustic version of "Everlong" by the Foo Fighters. It was so sweet and slow and just gentle that it made me tear up. I was busy most of the entire day and I'm sure that kept me preoccupied but even in times of silence or solitude, I'm working through this better.

However, at the present time I am listening to  Nine Inch Nails "The Day the Whole World Went Away (Quiet)" and it is heart wrenching.

I've had a very emotionally draining day. I honestly don't feel like writing about it. I just want to veg and watch tv. Maybe tomorrow will be better, I get to see Mel!!! I haven't seen her in 11 years.

Also, I'd like to add, that at certain times in my life, specific music played and had an absolute affect on my life. For a long time I loved Nirvana. I was so in love with the band and Kurt Cobain that I idolized
both to a somewhat unhealthy degree. Honestly, because of who I was back then, it literally annoys me to listen to an entire album. Lot's of memories. Some awful and some great but mostly, the emotion behind the time period and the songs and albums that coincide are so heavy that I can't do it. I asked Mike (Aimee) what her favorite band was and she responded "When?". My sentiment exactly, so here is the quick list so I can feel like I accomplished something with his blog and go watch tv for an hour before bed... I'd like to add, it's 1 a.m.

Years: 6-14, Nirvana
Years: 9-14, Hole, Babes in Toyland, Bush, NIN, Sublime, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Silverchair, Marilyn Manson.
Years: 13-16, The Doors, Led Zeppelin, Jimi H, Korn, Hole, Babes in Toyland, Sonic Youth, NIN, Marilyn Manson, A Perfect Circle,
Years: 15-23,  Queens of the Stoneage, The White Stripes, Weezer, Gorillaz, Portisheard, NIN, Joy Division, Depeche Mode, Duran Duran, Franz Ferdinand, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, David Bowie, The Beatles, Hot Hot Heat, At the Drive In, The Mars Volta, Spoon, Interpol, Talking Heads, U2
Years: 23-present: All of the above with less Nirvana, Babes in Toyland and Hole. Also, I never listen to Korn anymore...I don't even own any.

Also, I would like to add that my favorite songs are the following in no particular order and they aren't even bands that I list as 'favorite' necessarily:

Otis Redding: (Sittin' on) The Dock of the Bay
The Police: Roxanne
Marvin Gaye: Heard it Through the Grapevine
Franz Ferdinand: Michael
At the Drive In: Arcarsenal

Sorry for half-assing it. Sorry for swearing. Sorry I'm not sorry because I haven't figured out how to say it without swearing.

Listening to The Cardigans, Album: Gran Turismo- Starter. Also listening to Nine Inch Nails "Hurt", "The Day the Whole World Went Away (Quiet)". Rilo Kiley " Portions for Foxes". Also, The Police. And U2 -Sunday Bloody Sunday.